Are you ready for intimacy this holiday season? How to Stress-Proof Your Relationship!

It is wise to come up with a plan to help one another navigate the inherent stresses that arise in the holiday season. Being prepared and invested in these concrete tips will provide the connection and intimacy each of you desire.

Misunderstandings and poor communication can often arise between partners especially when we have different needs. One partner may be happy to hang out with the family all day and drink egg nog while the other may need to get outside, get some fresh air and participate in a ski or a nature walk. Communicate your needs and desires upfront before spending time with the family and assuming the other will want to do what you want. Talking about each of your needs ahead of time will manage expectations and avoid the pain of feeling disappointed or hurt. 

Strengthen your relationship and remember that you are a team! The goal is to collaborate and compromise when needed. Perhaps you are hosting this year and guests will be coming over to the house. Communicate who is going to do what and which tasks each of you want to take on. Be sure not to keep score, as this can lead to resentment. It is important that each partner feels the responsibilities are balanced. When necessary, modify the plans to avoid getting overwhelmed and flooded with emotions and reactivity. Take the time to check in with one another, without trying to manage or fix the other. 



Give small gestures of appreciation. This will go a long way in strengthening your relationship. We all want to be acknowledged for our efforts. A great way to relieve stress and stay connected is to share compliments, and gratitude and appreciation. Make an extra effort to notice the small things your partner does such as grocery shopping, wrapping gifts, taking out the trash or making time for you. Verbalize your appreciation. 

Most importantly, try to schedule private time to connect. Of course, it may be difficult to get away from family and friends during a busy holiday season, but making intentional efforts to spend a few hours or an evening together will have you feel calmer and loved. Engaging in a cuddle, sitting in front of the fireplace or going for a walk will do wonders for your connection. These important quality time activities are meaningful and restorative.

Having a plan helps you spend less time in stressful states and more time enjoying company with your loved ones. We wish you a joyous holiday season!